Hip-hop is one of my favorite music genres, but sadly hip-hop has disintegrated over the years. It’s just not what it once was. True hip-hop to me has always been about storytelling and technique, but it doesn’t seem like it takes much skill these days. I was listening to “Faded” by Tyga ft. Lil Wayne and even though Lil Wayne isn’t necessarily my favorite rapper I have to commend him on his clever word play in one of his lines. (Warning: Explicit language ahead) The line goes like this: “She knows my dick. She call that nigga Richard prior to me comin I had to stick my thumb in…” You see what he did there? Dick is another name for Richard and then Richard Pryor/”prior” was a comedian. I just thought that was so clever. Being an English major I can appreciate little nuggets like that within the lyrics. I just don’t like the direction that hip-hop has been going the past few years. It’s just been bizarre lately like that god awful song “Bodak Yellow” by Cardi B.
Writing for me has always been an outlet it seems. Whenever I’m going through things writing is always there. It’s a way to express myself without feeling judgment from others and lately I have been particularly stressed out and anxious about certain things, which is why I decided to write a poem off the top of my head. I quite often get moments like those when I’m dealing with something and I wish I could just find the right words to showcase how I’m feeling. Here is the poem that I wrote:
I feel like I’m drowning
With no support
Lost at sea with anxiety filled rage
Needing to scream but I can hardly even breathe
I feel like I’m stuck in time
Drowning beyond belief
With nothing in view
But my own fears and insecurities
*I feel like my poetry can be of service to some people. Sometimes people feel like they have no one to understand them, and my goal as a writer is to connect with people, to let others know that they’re not alone in this fight. It’s like one of my favorite Steinbeck quotes says, “A writer, out of loneliness, is like a distant star sending signals.” I always feel that quote so deeply because I truly understand. As a writer we’re trying to find other like us, who understand where we’re coming from. Writing can be a very therapeutic hobby and it can honestly help you assess your feelings and situation.
Ok, so I am a huge procrastinator and I have been wanting to work on my own chapbook of poems. For those who don’t know a chapbook is pretty much a booklet of poems, usually no more than 40 pages. I started putting my poems together and then I stopped, but I want to start back up tomorrow. I already have my theme for my poems. It’s going to be called “Scars.” I think that title is very fitting and goes with my theme because most of my poetry deals a lot with dealing with emotional scars and some physical scars. The idea of my theme being “Scars” just came naturally, as naturally as my poetry came to me. I tried doing everything online and by using Microsoft Word and putting all of my poems in an electronic folders but tomorrow I plan on doing everything old school and using pen and paper to write out all of poems that I want to include in my chapbook. I think it’ll be easier that way. Then I guess my next step will be to find a publisher. If any people out there know any good publishers I would be forever grateful for the guidance!
Every writers journey is different. Everyone has a different process of how they create. Some writers can write everyday and others rather write when they’re hit with inspiration. I’m the latter. I rarely write everyday unless I’m hit with inspiration everyday. I love writing poetry about what I’m going through in the moment or what emotion I’m feeling in that moment. I once wrote a poem about why I write. I think it summed up perfectly the different reasons why I write. Below is my poem:
I write to fill the pain
I write to avoid the pain
I write to understand the pain
I write to embrace the pain
I love to write because I can express who I am
When I feel like no one hears me
I write because sometimes…just sometimes I feel misunderstood
Writing is my release to unleash the pain inside
And sometimes I even create the pain
Pain for whatever…
It really doesn’t matter.
It just gives me something to write about.
*I remember writing this entirely on a whim. I was at work and the words just came to me.
Once in a while I just get hit with inspiration. Today was one of those days. Throughout the many jumbled thoughts in my mind I was a hit with a poetry subject. I wanted to express my thoughts about attraction and express my own experience that I’m dealing with in my own personal life. It’s funny because at the moment I didn’t have a notebook or pen to write with. I had to hurry and find a pen but then I still didn’t have anything to write on so I had to write the few lines I had in my head on a paper towel. I had to keep repeating the lines in my head, afraid that I would forget them. When inspiration hits you gotta go with it.
I started really writing poetry in college. I had a poem that I had written in college that I submitted to my college’s literary magazine and it got published. I didn’t really think too much of it until one of my professor’s really encourage me to continue writing because my poem was deep and also disturbing. I had written after my parents had split up and I was in 8th or 9th grade and I was feeling depressed. After reading my poem she actually thought I needed to go see the school counselor! I told her no and that I was fine because this was when I was a lot younger. Poetry for me is such a release. I’ve always been better at written communication and poetry is a channel that allows me to be who I am. People who write poetry approach poetry in different ways. Most people feel the need to write everyday. I don’t write everyday if I don’t feel that I have anything important to say. I usually write when I’m feeling inspired and if I’m dealing with something. Writing should be about writing about your own experiences. To my fellow writers how do you approach your writing? Here’s the link to my poem https://allpoetry.com/poem/10841967-Just-Another-Day-by-Consuela-Perry
“What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
Like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore–
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over–
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?”~Langston Hughes
*This is one of my favorite poems by the highly esteemed Harlem Renaissance writer Langston Hughes. This may be one of Hughes’ most famous poems and I especially love this poem in connection with the play, A Raisin in the Sun, which got its name from this poem. I feel like this poem really sets up the story of the play and the plot of the play is really built around this poem. It’s all about dreams. Essentially, what happens when you don’t follow your dreams? Based off of this poem it seems like Hughes’ is trying to convey the message that not following your dreams can have unpleasant consequences. When you think about your dreams and you stew over the fact that you can’t get anywhere, the weight of it all can be maddening. In the play this reaction is most notable in the character Walter Younger who had dreams of going into business for himself by using his dead father’s insurance money. He became obsessed. It’s almost like the dreams that he had were eating him up inside. I think this is a very good poem to reflect on. Tell me what are your thoughts on this poem? Here I’ve posted a link to the poem